A storm in a tea cup.

Theresa phoned me at lunchtime, all upset because Helen was upset. It turned out that Helen had been working on the steps outside the house when one of the neighbours came along. Now the neighbour is deaf and Helen's Spanish is still limited, so obviously there was a good chance of a misunderstanding. But the neighbour appeared to be saying that the girls had to allow tractors to get past the place where Helen was building the steps, or they might get a whopping fine.

Not speaking the local language is stressful at the best of times. Being told you're going to wind up in court for a crime you only half understand is guarenteed to send anyone's blood pressure up. And there are two people who own land they have to access via my friends' land, although they're not currently farming any of it. So did I happen to know the Spanish law on access to farm land? There was no mention onthe house deeds, and they couldn't think of anyone else to ask.

I don't know spit about Spanish law, but I pointed out that you couldn't have got a tractor down there before they started work. So I phoned the previous owner of the house who pointed out that:
a) Nobody has ever taken a tractor down there. Ever.
b) If you did get the tractor down, you couldn't get it to the other terraces because the ramps are about 50cm wide.
c) He'd been planning to build steps himself, and the other landowners thought that was a great idea.
d) It would be very easy for a deaf old lady to have got completely the wrong end of the stick.
e) They do have a legal requirement to allow pedestrian access to the other landowners - and the old lady isn't one of them.
f) It would be very nice for everyone, my friends included, if they made it easy to get a rotivator up and down.

I said thanks, and the girls had no problem with people crossing their land and were planning a rotivator ramp anyway.

So I phoned Helen and Theresa back and we all startd breathing again.

Alan Johnston

I'm a writer. I support free speech. Whoever is holding Alan Johnston should release him immediately. Only liars need to hide the truth.

Trying new things.

I've had two new experiences today. This morning I washed a dog for the first time in my life. My friend has "acquired" her mother-in-law's dog when Mother-in-law came to live with them. The old lady had been too infirm to wash the poor dog for months, and it was so dirty my friend couldn't bear to touch it - so it just got dirtier. Someone had to break the vicious circle. So I went along in old clothes, carrying dog shampoo and clothes to change into afterwards to do the deed. Actually it was much easier than I'd expected, and nothing at all like bathing a cat. (In my experience, all those gags about cat bathing going round the internet rather underestimate the difficulty.) I'd tied the dog up, but he didn't fight back or try to run away at all. In fact I think he was glad to be free of all those ticks. I must have taken at least 20 of the horrid things off him.

And this afternoon I made chutney for the first time. My parents used to make quite a lot of chutney, but I'd never done it, and for some reason I was nervous about trying. But then my friends in Franceses found something in the pumpkin family in their garden which turned out to be a panceno, which was too old just to eat as a vegetable in the normal way. I was advised to make jam out of it, but it's not my favourite jam and we don't each much jam anyway. Then I had to cut back a load of weeds, and it included some little green tomatoes. I like the wild tomatoes here when they're ripe, but these were very green. So I took the plunge and made a couple of litres of chutney. Then I tasted it and added more sugar. Then I tasted it again and added more sugar and some raisins. And then some more sugar. I wouldn't say it's the greatest chutney since the dawn of time, but it's OK for a first try. Especially since it's unheard of here, so I almost never see it in the shops.

This weird-looking fruit grows in my friends' garden in Franceses. None of us knew what it was, although the previous owners told us that it was edible and delicious. Well, with a bit of help from email friends, now we have an identification! It's a Monstera Deliciosa, from a split-leaf philodendron, also known as Mexican Breadfruit or Swiss Cheese Plant. And they aren't kidding about the "deliciosa" bit either. It tastes like a cross between creamy pineapple and banana. The little black specks in the fruit are apparently completely normal. Shame. It put the other two off so I got most of it to myself. I probably won't be so lucky next time.

Happy Birthday

I think I've been overdoing it again.

I finished the rush editing job for the Tourist Board on Saturday, and spent most of the afternoon on housework and pushing my son to do his homework. Sunday morning was more housework, and then I went off to Franceses to see Helen and Theresa. I was late, but I couldn't resist stopping to get this photo of a bee on Echium webbii. I had a really nice time there, then came home, seeing Farida on the way. she's going to have to go into hospital for an operation, so I promised I'd look after her daughter when that happens.

Monday was Helen's birthday. Since they had yet more paperwork to do, they came over early, while it was still possible to park in Santa Cruz, and we tried to sort out internet access for them. No such luck. The "Garafía-wide" wireless network doesn't cover their house. (To be fair, it's very difficult terrain for a line-of-sight system). They can connect via a mobile hone at a not-too-exhorbitant price, but the shop is out of the special modems. Oh well.

Then it was on to the bank to investigate the non-appearance of their cheque book. Somehow it had never been ordered. Oh well, it's on its way now.

We fetched Julio from school and had sandwiches for lunch in town. Most of the afternoon was spent getting Julio to do his homework, with a trip to Farida's. They read their email at my house and found they needed to go to the bank in the morning to pay the Notary. Oh great, we'd just been there! Then in the evening we went out for a pizza and some wine. We came home early because we were all tired, but it was fun.

So it was back to the bank in the morning. Only we were a bit slow getting off, and had to park miles away. Good exercise, I suppose. Then on the way back we went past the bathroom showroom. They left at 11 and I didn't get much else done before I had to fetch Julio. And the whole afternoon and evening (with short breaks) has been spent on getting him to do mounds of homework he was supposed to have done weeks ago. At least these days he confesses when there's still a week to go, instead of the night before or not at all, like last year!

But I really don't think I can keep up this pace much longer.